I was an orphan before I was born
no history completes me
no port in a storm
no future no animal complexity
whatever I saw
whatever I heard
what senses I tried
what danger I smelled
came from the unholy family
the ones who asked Hell
what to do with me
I was an orphan before I was born
and dressed in the clothes of the time
I curtsied and smiled unrefined like a mime
whoever I loved
whoever I feared
what I noticed was gone
what they said lived on infamously
children gone aimlessly
I was an orphan
not lonely or misunderstood
I was hungry and boasted
I was learning for good
whoever I trusted

whoever I lost

came before me and after
at considerable cost
I was an orphan and I still am

it keeps me from running

in my party dress
the shoes blacked to shining
those boys in their jest
one leaning in hunger

another angry at best
I didn’t exist in the universe of real

I didn’t persist at the altar of fate

those boys dogged my future

those boys understate
what orphans grow into

those orphans can wait
I live free or die a thousand times over
like the tide or the sunrise
the mussels dug under
I am orphan now and have
no need of a shell
I live free or die with no family’s bell
whoever I loved

whoever I feared
they are gone with the wind
they are magic uncertain
the last laugh is mine
I will grin wholly confused
I am an orphan today

I am orphan infinitum

ring for dinner this time
leave an empty space
ring for dinner, it’s time, 

it’s time and the place.